Life

RaleighWood, North Carolina

We are so stoked to announce that We Minus Me will be launching it’s first East Coast Campus Chapter at NC State this fall. Everything is in motion and should be rolling out in the next couple weeks. We will also be featuring some changes on our website, one of which is a page dedicated entirely to this new Campus Chapter that will include all of the events that will be happening at NC State. Stay tuned for more details on the official launch.

Sext Me and I’ll Sext You Back

Working with College Students so closely, we see a lot of crazy crap.  Some of it is funny and very creative…some of it is absolutely scary.  We all know that we live in a culture where Sex Sells.  Every commercial, every album cover, every movie, every magazine…you name it, it has something Sexy to help it sell or entice people to see/purchase it.  All of this is causing us to become numb and desensitized to the fact that this stuff can be very detrimental to society and our individual lives.  We wanted to post some of the statistics that we’ve run across regarding sex and pornography when it comes to young people…if these don’t bother you…I think you may want to check your moral compass to make sure it’s still working:

Teens and Sexting (if you don’t know what Sexting is, then you are officially OLD and need to stop a teenager on the street and ask them):

In a survey (2008) of teens and young adults done by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy and CosmoGirl.com:

•20% of teens overall have sent or posted nude or seminude pictures or videos of themselves.

•39% of teens are sending or posting sexually suggestive messages.

•71% of teen girls and 67% of teen guys who have sent or posted sexually suggestive content say they have sent/posted this content to a boyfriend/girlfriend.

•21% of teen girls and 39% of teen boys say they have sent such content to someone with whom they wanted to date or ‘hook up.’

•15% of teens who have sent or posted nude/seminude images of themselves say they have done so to someone they only knew online.

•51% of teen girls say pressure from a guy is a reason girls send sexy messages or images; only 18% of teen boys cited pressure from female counterparts as a reason.

•23% of teen girls and 24% of teen boys say they were pressured by friends to send or post sexual content.

•66% of teen girls and 60% of teen boys who have sent sexually suggestive content say they did so to be “fun or flirtatious” (this was their most common reason for sending sexy content).

•40% of teen girls who have sent sexually suggestive content said they sent sexually suggestive messages or images as “a joke.”

•34% of teen girls who have sent sexually suggestive content say they sent/posted sexually suggestive content to “feel sexy.”

•Among teen girls, 38% say they have had sexually suggestive text messages or emails—originally meant for someone else—shared with them, and 25% say they have had nude or semi-nude images—originally meant for someone else—shared with them.

•Among teen boys, 39% say they have had sexually suggestive text messages or emails—originally meant for someone else—shared with them, and 33% of teen boys say they have had nude or semi-nude images—originally meant for someone else—shared with them.

Internet Porn and College Students:

In 2009, Michael Leahy released results of a survey of 29,000 individuals at North American universities. This was published in Porn University: What College Students Are Really Saying About Sex on Campus.

•51% of male students and 32% of female students first viewed pornography before teenage years (12 and younger).
•35% of all students’ first exposure was Internet or computer-based (compared to 32% from magazines, 13% from VHS or DVD, and 18% from Cable or pay-per-view).
•51% of male students and 16% of female students spend less than 5 hours per week online for sex.
•11% of male students and 1% of female students spend 5-20 hours a week online for Internet sex.
•42% of male students and 20% of women said they regularly read romance novels, sexually explicit magazines, or regularly visited sexually explicit websites or chat rooms.

A study conducted in 2007 by researchers at Brigham Young University found that 21% of male college students view pornography “every day or almost every day,” and another 27% view pornography “1 or 2 days a week.”

A study of adolescents shows that a steady use of pornography frequently leads to cheating on one’s girlfriend, and a greater tolerance of more novel and bizarre sexual material.

Of more than 2,500 university and college students polled across Canada, 87% are having sex over instant messenger, webcams or the telephone, according to results of a national survey released in early 2006.

In surveys done by Covenant Eyes staff with deans of men, university RAs, and university chaplains, the number of men who struggle with watching Internet porn nearly always approaches 100%.

[Some may not think that these stats are a big deal.  Many think it's merely part of being young and they'll grow out of it...or they'll stop once they get married...here are just a few statistics to show you why it IS a Big Deal and why those thought processes are naive:]

Internet Porn and its Effects on Marriage:
According to the Journal of Adolescent Health, prolonged exposure to pornography leads to:
•An exaggerated perception of sexual activity in society
•Diminished trust between intimate couples
•The abandonment of the hope of sexual monogamy
•Belief that promiscuity is the natural state
•Belief that abstinence and sexual inactivity are unhealthy
•Cynicism about love or the need for affection between sexual partners
•Belief that marriage is sexually confining
•Lack of attraction to family and child-raising
According to sociologist Jill Manning, the research indicates pornography consumption is associated with the following six trends, among others:
1.Increased marital distress, and risk of separation and divorce
2.Decreased marital intimacy and sexual satisfaction
3.Infidelity
4.Increased appetite for more graphic types of pornography and sexual activity associated with abusive, illegal or unsafe practices
5.Devaluation of monogamy, marriage and child rearing
6.An increasing number of people struggling with compulsive and addictive sexual behavior
In a press release from the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers (divorce lawyers) reported that the most salient factors present in divorce cases are as follows:
•68% of the divorces involved one party meeting a new lover over the Internet.
•56% involved one party having “an obsessive interest in pornographic websites.”
•47% involved spending excessive time on the computer.
•33% involved excessive time spent speaking in chat rooms.
A brief survey on the effects of cybersex shows how wives of porn users develop deep psychological wounds, reporting feelings of betrayal, loss, depression, mistrust, devastation, anger, and sexual inadequacy. The same survey shows more than half of those engaged in cybersex lost interest in sexual intercourse, and one third of their partners lost interest as well.
“I have also seen in my clinical experience that pornography damages the sexual performance of the viewers. Pornography viewers tend to have problems with premature ejaculation and erectile dysfunction. Having spent so much time in unnatural sexual experiences with paper, celluloid and cyberspace, they seem to find it difficult to have sex with a real human being. Pornography is raising their expectation and demand for types and amounts of sexual experiences; at the same time it is reducing their ability to experience sex.” (Dr. MaryAnne Layden)

(Sources available through covenanteyes.com)

Fences Bring Freedom…by Steven Furtick

Often times we repost things on here because we think they are very valuable and that we can’t say them better ourselves…so we don’t bother to try.  This is one of those posts.  College is the “Epitome of Freedom”.  I mean seriously…you are finally out from your parents giant thumb…you can stay out as late as you want, doing whatever you want, with whomever you please, while having a brewski in one pocket and a pack of American Spirits in the other….right?  But the ability to do whatever you doesn’t always equal Freedom…and it definitely doesn’t always turn out well.  Here’s a blog from a Pastor that we think has a lot of insightful things to say…Check it here:

Let us know your thoughts if you get time.  Send us one of your stories and we may even post it on the site!

More Pics From Spring Break

Random pics from our week in PCB…

Spring Break…Thursday Homies

Some more pics from a beautiful day on the beach and some Rad people!

Spring Break…More Homies

Here’s some pics of our new homies from our second day on the beach:

Spring Break…New Friends

We made a lot of rad new friends today…thanks for stopping by our tent (with no top)!  We’ll be out there all week so stop back by.  Much Love to all of you!

Spring Break Countdown…2 Days!

Spring Break Countdown…3 Days!

Some more pics to get you psyched!

Think Inside the Box…

This is a recent blog post from Pastor Steven Furtick.  He is a very wise man and always offers some great insight.  I was actually at his church when he preached a message about this exact topic and it was incredible.  This is something that we are all guilty of, especially here at We Minus Me.  We do talk a lot about what we would do if we had more resources, were able to work full-time, and the list goes on and on.  Thinking inside the box should really be considered “Out of the Box Thinking” because so few do it.  It is actually a very creative idea…and incredibly freeing.  Read this article below and see how you can apply this concept to your own life…

Think Inside the Box

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When it comes to our limitations, most people operate out of an if, then mindset.

If I had __________, then I would ___________.
If I could __________, then I would ___________.

So…
If I had more money, then I would buy a nicer house.
If I could sing, then I would be a musician.
If my children were in a different stage of life, then I would move.
If my church had a state of the art facility, then we would grow.

You encounter this same kind of thinking in the corporate world. It’s called thinking outside the box:
What would you do if you had unlimited money? Could sing? Had children who were at a different stage? Had a state of the art facility?

Sounds nice, but this mindset is a breeding ground for frustration. Why?

Because you don’t have unlimited money.
You can’t sing.
Your children aren’t in a different stage of life.
And your church still has the same building.

In other words, for now you’re stuck with your limitations. And while it might be liberating to think about life as if you didn’t have them, they’re still there and you have to work with them.

I’m not saying that you shouldn’t plan ahead or that you shouldn’t dream. Of course you should. But your box is never going to expand to the place where you’re thinking outside of it until you learn to live in it.

I would challenge you to think inside the box. Stop waiting for what you want and work what you’ve got. How much money do you have? What talents has God given you? How can you maximize your church or corporation with the assets and resources you currently have in place?

Your greatest limitation is God’s greatest opportunity.
If He wanted you to have ________, He would have provided it to you.
If He wanted you to do ________, He would have made you able.

But He didn’t.

So there must be something greater in mind that He wants to do through your limitation. He must have something in mind He wants to do with what you actually have and actually can do.

Most of us are so focused on what we don’t have that we’re blinded to what we do have. If you had what you think you needed you wouldn’t be able to use what God’s actually put inside of you.

And what He has put inside of you is all you need to accomplish all that He’s called you to do. It’s all He needs too.

Even if it seems limited to you.